The body positive community can often be judgemental of those wanting to lose weight and you may have felt bad about wanting to lose weight in the past but you shouldn't.
It's not shameful to want to lose weight, it's normal in our society to be thinking this way.
The reason that body positivity activists and leaders express that wanting to lose weight is a negative thing is because they have reached a mindset shift that makes things look really different.
Wanting to lose weight is not bad, ever, but when you begin a journey towards Intuitive Eating and body positivity to do gain some insights that may make you think differently.
The goal of weight loss is common but it isn't always all that helpful. It is not shameful to want it but first you must really understand it. We have been told since the '70s that we can control our weight; that if we're fat it means we are lazy, indulgent and have no will power and if we'er thin then we are active, ambitious and strong. This is just not the case. We cannot really control our weight.
When you diet you may see some initial weight loss but in losing this weight (through dieting) you have lowered your metabolism and the weight begins to creep back on. This is where our lack of control comes in. We cannot change our metabolism, genetics or inner workings of our body and this is what determines our weight (along with a healthy relationship with food and exercise).
Dieting gives us a sense of control but it is false. This is something to consider when working towards a weight loss goal.
Another reason why body positive people don't think you should be trying to lose weight is because if you go into Intuitive Eating or body positivity with a weight loss goal it will not work. Intuitive Eating can absolutely be turned into just yet another diet if you begin it in the dieting mindset (and working to lose weight IS a dieting mindset).
Wanting this weight loss is not bad but it is interesting to explore WHY you want it.
What is the true motivator behind your weight loss. Is it looks, health, judgement of others, that inner critic's voice never leaving you alone. What is the purpose of this weight loss.
If health is the reason then I do want you to reconsider what healthy means. Losing weight doesn't necessarily mean you are healthier just like gaining weight doesn't mean you are less healthy. If health is your motivation, repairing your relationship with food and movement will bring you lasting health benefits that weight loss just cannot give you.
Weight loss is a losing battle. It's kind of like if you're desperate to get a date. When you are pining for a man to take you out, it rarely ever goes well. It is when you are living your life for yourself, fulfilled without NEEDING a relationship and loving what you do that a partner can come along and see your true amazingness. Of course they want to go out with you! Who wouldn't?
It's kind of like that. Wanting to lose weight (especially when you feel that you won't be happy without it), is a struggle. You struggle to eat perfectly, which of course leads to a binge, which then leads to guilt and shame, which then leads to yet another strict diet. Wanting to lose weight will generally result in a yo-yo effect that is VERY unhealthy for your body.
When you dive into Intuitive Eating with your weight on the back burner you can truly start to discover who you are without the constant pursuit of weight loss. This person will be more balanced, happier and most of all healthier! Getting back in tune with your body's signals will lead you to balanced and consistent health. But if you go at this with the wish to lose weight, it won't work. This is because you'll inevitably start denying your body the fuel that it needs in order to shave off a few more pounds and you'll get stuck back into that deadly dieting cycle.
A true immersion in Intuitive Eating and body positivity will bring to light the fact that your body knows how to regulate itself. When you have healthy practices around food and movement your body will settle into it's set weight (this is the weight your body is most comfortable living at).
It's okay to want to lose weight but if you're working towards ditching the diet you will find this desire become less and less prominent in your life. This can be a scary thought but just think what could come from this: freedom from self hate and the dieting mindset, a real feeling of inner peace and self love and a healthy, balanced life you actually enjoy!
If you're ready to move forward, even if you are still wanting to lose weight, save your seat in our free group coaching session coming up!